Joey Yapp

Never once

2012-02-07T19:49:00.000+08:00

Is 6:25 am now. It has been a very long time since the last time I am able to be wide awake at this time of the day. I wanted to wake up early to study for a test which I am extremely nervous about but a letter on the table which I believe was picked up by my room mate last night when I was asleep ruined my study mood.

The letter is a prayer that I prayed so many days but it is not the answer I was asking for. I did not know what to do. I am exhausted. I came back to my room, try to pick up my textbook to study but I could not focus. So, I picked up my Bible. I need to talk to my Father.

Have you ever feel the things that hurt you when you know there's a Father in Heaven who loves you? Even though the things that I am going through now is nothing compare to all the hurts out there in the world, sometime I wonder, where is He?

Here I am, hurting, lost, early in this morning, desperate to hear from Him. Today's devotion was on 1 Timothy 2, is about our prayer and His promise that if anyone come to Him, they will be saved. Jesus died for everyone of us that day, including me. I already have the best answer of prayers I can ever ask for, and now as ironic as it can be, I am stumbling over some problems in life which seems so small when compare to that glorious day, when there's no more tears, no more hurt.

We all know where we are going, but sometime you just do not know when and how are you gonna get there. Maybe there are things you cannot see, but all the things that happening now is to bring a better ending, some day somehow. You will see. So, sometime, we just have to say a prayer, and hold on to it. I believe, God has a purpose in everything, and He makes everything beautiful in His time.

Never once, did we ever walk alone. In every steps, we are breathing in His grace. God is faithful.

Love,
Joey

Nella mia preghiera, Quanta fede c'è

2011-10-15T02:45:00.000+08:00

Fall is near. Time in USA goes through very fast....

I remember I used to think, why did I get myself in so much trouble of being here. Why will I choose to come here to the States for nursing, when I got offered full scholarships back home and even a job right after I graduate...Plus, nursing in Liberty University is hard. Legit. HARD.

But, I am glad, that I follow what I felt right in my heart. Turned down the scholarships, went back home, work for 8 months, pray hard, and waiting for God to answer my prayers. And He did. Some how, I was able to go to Liberty despite of all the financial problem. Scholarships were provided, as well as a decent paid part time job. God has been faithful.

Nursing course here is hard but I am thankful to be here, a university which honor our Savior. I got to learn beyond what nursing courses can offer, a heart purely to serve our God. Each day I walked into class room, I learned more and more about giving and serving. Jesus shapes my heart to be more like His, every day.

I am very grateful that I did not stay in my comfort zone. I am very thankful that God is with me in my every day challenges and craziness. He has been very faithful through this journey, and I can always find a place to rest, under His wings.

God is faithful to me, and to you too! Hope that you are walking with Jesus today and you feel the joy too!

Love,
Joey

住在神里面

2011-07-24T01:48:00.001+08:00

好久没有到这里来了。每次学校放假，我总是也让我的心放假，不想管身边的人，事，和物，只想闭上眼睛，睡觉。可是也因为这样，我渐渐在不知觉的情况下，把我的心关闭了。

前天，我又去了医院帮忙。我很不想去，因为最近美国的天气很热，还热过马来西亚，我快受不了了，还要走路，乘搭巴士。。。可是，因为不好意识请假，所以还是硬着头皮去了。。。

我负责的病房大多数都是老人，我的工作只是倒水啊，扶他们上厕所，喂他们吃饭等等。。空荡的时间很多，其实很闷的。很多老人看起来很孤单，他们总是望着窗外或门外，希望他们的爱人，亲人能出现。我想跟他们讲话解闷，可是他们说话含糊不清，如果他们说的是中文，我都可能听不清，更何况是英文。

所以，每当我听不懂他们说什么，我终会握着他们的手，对着他们笑，希望他们能感觉到一些温暖。我总希望能帮他们多做些什么，可是就不知道能做些什么。

一直到我遇到了一位名叫Laureen 的老女人。我那天负责喂她病床旁边的婆婆吃饭，他们两个都不认识对方，可是很快就打成一片。他们两位心脏有问题，刚动了手术，所以身体非常虚弱。当婆婆吃饱睡了后，Laureen开始呼吸很困难，想喝水，所以我赶快弄了些冰水给他，然后坐下来和他聊天。他开始和我聊他一生的故事。她原本有个很美好的家庭，她丈夫喜欢小孩，所以他们有很多儿子和女儿。可是，他有个小女儿在小时候车祸死了，另外一个儿子也在小时候死了，过不久丈夫也死了。。把孩子都留给他一个人带大。她说她年轻时一天打3个工，未料能让孩子读书，可是最近大儿子因脑瘤去世了。然后他说了一句话，让我的眼泪流了下来。“God really do torn my heart”。

我想立刻告诉她，神知道你的痛也会医治你，我还没来得及说，她紧接着就告诉我，"but I have faith, that He will bring me through". 我在心里面大大的AMEN！我们开始聊更多身在我们生命所行的神迹，也知道神会与我们度过生命一切的难关:)

在Laureen身上我学会了宝贵的一课。无论生活有多困难，无论生活让我们流尽了眼泪，神甚至还让Laureen的心真正的破碎，只要我们专心仰赖耶稣，住在神里面，耐心等候神，我们就能得到安息，如鹰展翅上腾:)

刚刚在一位很爱神的朋友的脸书听到这首歌让我有深深的感动，在这与你们分享。

我知道我可以为他们做什么了，不是每个病人都和Laureen一样认识耶稣，所以我可以传福音，让他们能更积极面对生命的挑战，也得到安息。我也能为他们祷告，但愿有一天能在天堂看到他们的笑脸 :)

Chosen But Free

2011-05-03T09:52:00.000+08:00

In the book Chosen But Free- A Balanced View of God’s Sovereignty and Free Will,Norman Geisler answered the questions a lot of people asked which are thedilemma of whether God alone decide who will be saved and who will not, andalso does God give us the freedom to choose. I like the fact that Geisler presented his views in a moderate andsensible way rather than focus on one strong perspective against another. Healso made a lot of arguments based on the scriptures from the Holy Bible whichas a result made his arguments sound and strong.

I like how Geisler started off inthe first chapter of the book by pointed out the extreme sovereignty view andthe extreme free will view and then tried to balance both views out. Some ofthe points which were made from the both extreme views did sounded wrong.However, I agree with the points which were made by Geisler in his balanceview.

Upon debating between sovereignty viewand free will view, in chapter 3, Geisler pointed out God’s characteristicsbased on scriptures. I like that Geisler acknowledged that God is before allthings, created all things, uphold all things, above all things, can do allthings and will accomplish all things. He also showed the scriptures whichproved that God is in control in all things too. However, Geisler also sharedthat God gives human free will. He pointed out that God gives free will toAngels (2 Peter 2:4), free will to human before the fall when Adam and Eve weregiven the choice to obey God for not to eat the forbidden fruit, free willafter the fall, and also free will for the fallen descendents of Adam (Roman6:23).

After that, Geisler pointed out thefoundation beliefs of both extreme sovereignty view and extreme free will view.He also discussed the negative consequences from both views when they werebrought to an extreme part. The part which stood out for me in Chosen But Free is when Geislerdiscussed about is John Calvin a Calvinist. John Calvin himself believes thatJesus Christ died for the sins of everyone in the world which is against thebelief of extreme Calvinism. Furthermore, I love the way Geisler summarizedboth moderate and extreme ways to understand the five point of T.U.L.I.P whichoften are used to define Calvinism in a table (294). It helps me understand betteron the views of Calvinism.

In conclusion, I love this book, Chosen But Free. I will definitelyintroduce this book to my friends since it is not just simply an opinion fromthe author, Norman Geisler, but also great points and arguments made by himbased on solid scriptures from the Holy Bible. This book truly showed thearguments and points from both Calvinism’s view and Armenian’s view which arenot bias but formed from solid word of God.

十字架上

2011-04-26T05:57:00.000+08:00

昨天，我和几位很棒的马来西亚朋友庆祝耶稣复活的纪念日。每到这个时候，我心里的感触就会很大，想起耶稣为我的罪钉死在十字架上，心里非常难过。可是，三天后，就像耶稣答应我们的，耶稣战胜了死亡，复活了。

昨天去了教会后，我们几个去了旁边一个小教堂。里面有个很大的十字架，旁边有个桌子，上面有几张纸和笔。那里挂着一个便条，上面写着，耶稣把你的负担钉在十字架上了。我拿起笔，把我这一生的负担都写在纸上。过后，我就把纸钉在十字架上。

我一边钉，一边想起耶稣为我做的每一件事。虽然有很多孤独的夜晚，我一切的烦恼让我喘不过气来，可是耶稣一直都陪着我。耶稣一定非常有耐心，因为我总是让耶稣失望。回想起来，有好多时候，我会埋怨耶稣不听我的祷告，我会生气为什么耶稣不给我我说要的。。。却忘了，耶稣应许过，他赐给我们的都是最好的，他无所不在，他爱我。。。

看着那被钉满小字条的十字架，想着，耶稣不止受鞭伤，受刑罚，为我们成了赎罪祭，也为我们这些无数的烦恼，被钉死在十架。耶稣作的一切，莫过于让我们得平安，得医治。虽然眼前即将要来的狂风暴雨会让我害怕，可是，在这个时刻，我心只有我的主，耶稣，我唯一的爱。耶稣已为我战胜了最恐怖的死亡，接下来的苦难有耶稣陪我一起度过，是不会难倒我的。

何等牺牲的爱。

Worship

2011-04-16T04:44:00.000+08:00

From the culture I came from, people worship different kinds of gods. Thus, it is very important that I know, what kind of God that I am worshiping, and the reasons I worship Him. Sadly, sometime during worship, I realized that a lot of people in my church just do not seem to be excited or "genuinely" worshiping God, or sometime, even myself. It seems like we were singing out of the words shown in the slides and our minds are in different states, maybe thinking of the work that were not finish the past week or troubles at home that need to be settled.

True worship reminds me of a young boy I met in my church Sunday school when I served as a teacher. Whenever he sang in church, his eyes are shining so bright and he always has this really beautiful smile on his face. After services, he will always turn to the other children beside him and say: "I love Jesus!" He is always so pumped up for church and even in groups, he always ask questions about the Bible story which we talked about that day and when he figured out the story, he will help his friends to understand it and then praise God together. Whenever is time to go home, he will always hold my hand and tell me that Jesus loves me too, and he will be a good boy for Jesus in home and in school.

This young boy reminded me of true worship because he knows exactly who his Savior is, and because of His mercy and grace, he wants to walk in the light and give praise to Jesus every day. Thus, whenever I think of worship, I think of praising God on how awesome He is, who loves me so much and willing to die for my sins. For me, true worships come from the bottom of the heart. Writing a poet to tell God how wonderful He is, is a kind of worship. Dance when we are filled with the joy from God is a kind of worship. Sing to praise how great is our God is a kind of worship. And for me, my kind of worship is playing music on my piano to tell Jesus that He is beautiful.

"For from Him and through Him and to Him are all things. To Him be the glory forever. Amen." Romans 11:36

My Testimony (Theo 202)

2011-02-21T07:31:00.000+08:00

I believe in a God all my life but I never really know what He can do for me. I grew up in a Buddhist family and I was constantly told that I have to do good things so that God will take care of me and I will not become animals or plants in my second life. Frankly, I thought life was meaningless at that point of my life. There were so many questions without answers, and I did not know what was the purpose of my life.

When I was ten, my parents went to church with their friends and they brought me and my brother along. I remember listening to my Sunday School teacher telling us about God loves us so much that He sent His only Son, Jesus Christ to die for our sins. I thought that was a very amazing story. Although I did not know much about this "western God" (that's what we called Jesus in our culture), I was very eager to know more about Him.

I began to read the Bible and a lot of my questions were answered from this incredible book. I realised that God created us, but human chose to do the wrong things and disobeyed Him. However, He still love us and let His own Son, Jesus to die for us. All God asked was to know we are in need of forgiveness and believe in Him so that we will not be punished and go to Heaven to live with Him. I felt the love from Him, and thus I said sorry to God and know that He will forgive me. I also believe in Jesus now and live by obeying Him in my life.

勇敢

2011-02-06T11:47:00.000+08:00

虽然已经好几天没下雪了，可是这几天还是很冷。。时而还飘着小雨，阴阴沉沉的，怪想家。。

感觉一个人勇敢了好久，虽然不想承认，可是我真的累了。要到哪一个时候，我才能不再一个人奋斗，一个人忍受那么多的难题，一个人落泪，一个看电视，一个人吃饭，一个人写部落格。。

可是，今天读到诗篇二十七篇，大卫王的话提醒了我。。我并不是一个人，神一直都与我同在。虽然眼前好像没有了希望，浪好大，自己的船好像都快沉了，却感觉不到神的存在。。。可是，耶稣一直都在，他就在我们的船里，只是，耶稣睡着了。耶稣既然都睡着了，就代表这个浪根本难不倒他，难不倒我们。耶稣答应我们会带我们到岸的另一边，就不会食言。反而，我们更因此而有信心，努力勇敢的往前行，相信耶稣，永不动摇，也不怀疑耶稣。

我要向高山举目，应我的帮助从造天地的耶和华而来:)

不能回家的新年

2011-02-04T10:07:00.000+08:00

刚和家人说了一个半小时的电话，耳朵好疼啊~ 好想回家过年哦。。。看了弟弟的照片，我更想回家了。。

以前奶奶都会煮好吃的，今年也不例外。。。如果我在家就好了~
刚才想了想，到底几时我才能回家过年，可是越想越没有希望。。我还是乖乖为我当初出国的决定负责任吧。。。

新年快乐，我爱的人们！^^

Psalm 40

2010-10-19T12:37:00.000+08:00

今天回到房间, 我终于放弃那个一直努力坚持的自己了.我知道, 上帝让我来到这里,是有理由的,牠一定是想让我不但只是学了个护士学位,也想让我看到牠的大能,也借着神学让我更加认识牠,能在神的事工帮忙...可是,今晚我累了...好多好多的压力每天都等着我去扛,就算再努力我也无法做的很好...想着想着,眼泪不知不觉地流了....感觉无力,渺小的我, 开始打开床边那本分红色, 被雨淋过的圣经,因为此时此刻,只有从父那里能得到安慰...刚好,我就翻到以前读到一半,大卫王写的诗篇.....

Psalm 40

I waited patiently for the Lord;

he turned to me and heard my cry,

He lifted me out of the slimy pit,

out of the mud and mire;

he set my feet on a rock,

and gave me a firm place to stand.

He put a new song in my mouth, a hymn of praise to our God.

Many will see and fear the Lord,

and put their trust in him.

虽然我软弱,我的神却如此的强大, 我会继续努力,只因相信,神的大能会成就大事!

忙中的喜悦

2010-10-16T12:59:00.000+08:00

终于，半个学期过了。这学期真的好忙哦，压力也非常大，能不能考上护士专业就靠现在了。咬紧牙关也要考得上，我会加油的。

喜悦 No. 1:
虽然很忙，我却觉得这学期过得挺快乐的。我找到了一个新的工作，当了足球队的经理，真的是感谢神，这样就可以减轻家里的负担了。再说，从这工作，我学会谦卑，听从上司的吩咐，也让我深深体会上帝的恩赐。

喜悦 No. 2:
我这个学期的室友很棒。虽然她是中国人，可是我们有很多时候都很难沟通，也许我的中文真的退步了:( 但是，和她在一起真的很快乐。我们有着很多的共同点，最重要的是，我们两个都是远距离爱情的战士！有她，孤单的日子就没那么难过了。我们很常互相扶持，祷告，她让我学会了这么捉一个灵命上的好姐姐，好朋友。我总觉得上帝安排路雅做我的室友是有原因的，好让我们能更亲近耶稣，更认识上帝:)

喜悦No. 3:
我期待。期待一个我有信心，在上帝预备的时候，会发生一件在我生命中最快乐的事。成为基督徒已经快十一年了。十一年来，我没有不曾帮我生命中，两个我很尊重，很爱的人祷告，祈求上帝，能感动他的心，堂开她的爱。我知道上帝已在开始动工，我不曾放弃祷告，因为我相信，我期待。

喜悦 No. 4:
我爱我的弟弟！没想到，来到美国，那么馋嘴的我，最想念的不是食物，而是一个能让我哭，笑，生气，感动的弟弟。真的很快乐，看见他不停的在灵命上的成长，他的感染力非常强，在他的生命路程里，我真的学到了很多。弟弟，我唯一的弟弟，叶家华，姐姐想你了:)

喜悦 No. 5:
詹绍福。嘻嘻:) 他就和他名字一样，只要一想起他，我就觉得自己很幸福。虽然我们分割了两地，那种幸福却是很接近的，甜甜的。。。上帝对我真的太好了！以前，妈妈都有帮祷告，希望我能遇到一个好男人。我也常祷告，等待。只是，我没想到，上帝预备的比我想象的好上很多很多倍。遇到他，相爱，在一起到现在，我真的不知道更美丽会是什么了。因为，每一天，我都过得比童话故事还要实在，美丽。我爱你，我的快乐:)

喜悦 No.6:
当然，我的喜悦也来自一斑我爱的朋友们。他们每个人都不一样，有着不一样的故事。就是这样，他们可爱的让我快乐。加油哦朋友们。不要停止期待和相信，但也不要执著和顽固。我知道，幸福是属于每个人的，只要我们不要因为一直往前方跑是那么的吸引而奋不顾身的跑，累了也不管。有时候，选择转过弯，也许幸福就在那儿等着你呢:)

好了。希望大家都很快乐，快乐也是一生，不快乐也是一生，那么不如选择快快乐乐的过生活吧！

远距离的幸福

2010-06-22T10:20:00.011+08:00

爱上你的那一刻, 我问了自己:"你能承受得了远距离吗?"

其实我害怕的是自己承受不了...

你终于开口, "可以当我女朋友吗?"
当时,突然变得很勇敢,
心中有种莫名的感动,相信你就是神为我准备了很久的王子.
我愿意...

每天只能透过电脑看见你,
一个人呼吸着没有你的空气很辛苦,
可是对你的爱却莫名其妙的增加.

渐渐地我习惯
右手空着的感觉,
天凉了自己取暖,
看着天空微笑,
看了伤心的电影会笑,
看了喜剧会哭,
每天都和耶稣说:"请你与他同在."

在一起两个月,
见面也只有那短短的七天...

但是,
我有预感,
有一天我们会永远在一起.
因为你是上帝给我最美的礼物.
让我成为最幸福的公主...

Chinese New Year 2010

2010-02-15T04:48:00.003+08:00

How much I wish i can be home,
sitting at the round table with my love ones,
eating the best food from the best cook, my grandma,
feeling love from my favorite people in this world,
enjoying the winning and the shouting of the guys,
chit-chat with the girls,
how much I wish.

How much I wish I can get the flowers not by mail,
talking and smiling not through internet,
enjoy the best romantic dinner like it used to be,
how much I wish.

Happy Chinese New Year and Valentine's Day!

Joey

Believe

2010-01-15T05:40:00.002+08:00

Just came back from the freshman seminar with my room mate. Although I am a sophomore, they still make me to attend the seminar, is like a compulsory thing. However, I enjoyed it. We got a really good speaker who shared so many things with us. Our group is very small, we got 3 people only but we are cool :)

What really comes into my mind today is the reason why I am here in Liberty University. I want to be able to learn more about God's word, to mix with other awesome Christians, and to grow together in faith. In the other word, I want to be ready when God wants to use me as a tool to shine His light.

Life is not gonna be fine and i know it. It is going to have storms coming in and by, but i know, God will never give me anything that I cannot handle. I know, I just have to believe that I can do all things through Him. He who is the Creator of the earth, makes everything possible. Realizing that this whole new journey that I am going to start soon has really kicking in, I just want to say it out loud, "Lord, I am ready, not as I will, but as You will".

"Watch and pray that you may not enter into temptation. The spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak."- Matthew 26: 41

Love,
Joey

The Start of my Degree Journey

2010-01-06T07:17:00.006+08:00

Looking at the snow in the pathway, feeling the freezing cold weather that hurts the nerves and spine of my body, had a very American breakfast and pizza hut for dinner, I still cant believe, I am here again, the United States of America.

The feeling of leaving home again is weird. It was not nerve wracking tears pouring down moment, It was not happy dippy jumpy kind of emotion either. It falls in between, the most awkward part where one does not want to be in at all.

However, what is amazing about this is the new journey im about to start. Leaving home is sad, but with the blessings from my family, this journey is way more wonderful. This is like a dream comes true, a prayer which has been answered. I can never believe that Im actually here again, and this time is for my college degree that im here again. Lord, You certainly can make miracle happens.

This is the second night I am here in Richmond, Virginia. The weather is cold, 0 or 1 degree celcius most of the day and then drop to negative 2 or 1 at nights but im cool. I knew I always will love Texas better but now, Im going to call Virginia, BEAUTIFUL. As soon as I got off from the airport, I saw pretty tall trees and lakes and the sky which is the bomb, the combinations makes a beautiful picture, it amazed me how great is the Painter of all these. I got to stay at Diana's house for a couple days before I head out to Liberty University. Their house is so cozy, and the neighborhood is so quiet and beautiful. Everything has been beautiful ever since I came.
And I know, it can only get better.

"He has made everything beautiful in its time."- Ecclesiastes 3:11

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

What can I do to make it right,
Even if it hurts,
Knowing that this will be the best place,
God wanted us to be,
I will be strong,
and no fear.

Bon Voyage 3/1/2010

A bag pack, a bottle of water, legging with short pants, a heart full of God, Virginia,
here I come.

Our destination.

We certainly are missing you guys.

A glance of everything.

Love,
Joey

A Time for Everything

2009-10-11T14:50:00.004+08:00

Last few days have been really crazy, yet I'm learning to walk through this rain. Thank You, for the blessings and also not giving me more than I can handle.
I'm content.

Above All

Above all powers, above all kings
Above all nature and all created things
Above all wisdom and all the ways of man
You were here before the world began

Above all kingdoms, above all thrones
Above all wonders the world has ever known
Above all wealth and treasures of the earth
There's no way to measure what you're worth

Crucified
Laid behind a stone
You lived to die
Rejected and alone
Like a rose
Trampled on the ground
You took the fall
And thought of me
Above all

Above all powers, above all kings
Above all nature and all created things
Above all wisdom and all the ways of man
You were here before the world began

Above all kingdoms, above all thrones
Above all wonders the world has ever known
Above all wealth and treasures of the earth
There's no way to measure what you're worth

Crucified
Laid behind a stone
You lived to die
Rejected and alone
Like a rose
Trampled on the ground
You took the fall
And thought of me
Above all

Crucified
Laid behind a stone
You lived to die
Rejected and alone
Like a rose
Trampled on the ground
You took the fall
And thought of me
Above all

Like a rose
Trampled on the ground
You took the fall
And thought of me
Above all

There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens...
(Ecclesiastes 2:4)

Time Heals

2009-10-03T01:18:00.006+08:00

I had a pretty long day today, but had lots of fun, as though i just had the fun of the week in a day. I had to wake up earlier today to go to school and studied for my English literature quiz which has nothing exciting about it but things that happened after that rock all the way.

I had lunch with Shin yie today and we got to talk a bit. Love catching up with her. She seems like she is different. A good way too. And i really hope that she will stand strong and fight the good fight with the special strength she has.

Then I finally got to spend so much time with my angel, Yi juin. It has been a long time since we hung out. It was so much fun playing frisbee, talking in the library and having her in my house earlier on, then went for dinner and walk with her on the side ways. Every little moment spending with the most wonderful friend in the world sparks up my day. She makes everything seems so beautiful and simple to me.

All in all, frisbee is the bomb for the day. I love frisbee just as much as i love everyone that came out today! Vivian, Wenni, Shin Yie, Jia Wen, Yi Juin, Vj, and Alvin, you guys are more than awesome! :) Im really thankful for everyone of them to be in my life. Not to mention, the sweetest housemate, Missy, she is beyond awesome!

For my angel : Time heals almost everything, so give time, Time.

Life can be as colorful as it can be, when you started to paint on it with every single beautiful moment with the person you love.

with love,
jojo

To Be Away

2009-09-28T22:44:00.002+08:00

Someone asked me the other day,
"Joey, what exactly do you want?"
Just as simple as the question was,
I have no answer for it.

"I don't know"
__________________________

"Oh well, you already have everything, and is time to be away from everything."
"so you will know, what do you really want."

邂逅

2009-09-27T23:06:00.003+08:00

邂逅
那年的春天
她的出现
让我的中学生涯多了一些颜色
还记得开学的第一天
她静静的坐在课室的另一边
好像很寂寞。
她，是我们班上的转学生。
从不认识，
到参加她的十五岁生日会，
到一天至少两小时的电话，
S.H.E 的演唱会，
无数次的晚上过夜闲聊，
一起哭泣，
一起大笑，
一起许愿，
一起期待，
吵架，
冷战，
了解，
一切的一切，
成了我最想保护的回忆。
和她的邂逅，
就像不可能会发生的奇迹，
发了很久的梦终于实现，
一种说不出来的，
幸福的意外。

她，是我永远的好朋友。

罗丽咪。

A Broken Heart

2009-09-27T14:48:00.005+08:00

It has been raining a lot recently. It is a good thing though, since the hot weather is getting on our nerves sometime. But when it rains, we tend to look back to the times, whether it is sad or happy when we look into the sky. I remember I used to love sticking my hands out from the window, feeling the rain drops, thinking of a dream which have not come true.

Recently, one of my best friend just broke up from a relationship. They both ended their relationship in a mature way which makes it hard for my precious friend to be happy again. I know how much he meant for her and for sure she meant so much for him as well. Is just that, for this time being, bringing the relationship to an end is the best thing to do. I am really impressed by her though, her strength and the way she faces the situation, she is like a lily white, standing strong, never let her head faces down.

But i know, deep down inside that body, she has a broken heart. She is still smiling, but I miss the smiles during those times. I know she is going to get better, it takes time and love. I really wish that, someone, someday, can gather all the shattered pieces of her heart and put them together again. And i know, God will put a smile on her face.

That day, when i was talking with my lovely cousin, i found out that she is missing that smile she used to have too. I love hanging out with her, just to know more about her each day makes me happy. She is pretty, she got a charming personality and she is always happy from the outside. Somehow, i realized that she feels empty inside, sometime. We never got to talk about Jesus when we were around, but that day, we got to talk about Him for the first time. It makes me sad whenever I recalled that sweet talk in the room. What took me so long to bring Jesus up to her? I'm ashamed of myself. If I will have share to her earlier, maybe, she will never have a chance to be broken in relationships, maybe, we will have been sitting together in the church, lifting our hands up together and sing along a beautiful hymn.

Then, another special gift from the summer, is a friend who seems like a gift from Heaven. She is beautiful from the outside and the inside. Although she is not a Christian, she has a wonderful heart. She is the most loyal friend I meet so far, but she got her heart broken every single time. Still, she is not giving up to serve people who betrayed her. I learned so much from her and i know God put her in my life for a purpose. I promised her that, I will be the friend who will not break her heart, but treasure her forever. She is a wonderful lost sheep of Christ, a great friend, and an awesome summer.

All of the broken hearts that I met make me feel so guilty. I thought I had a broken heart, I thought i will never dare to dream again since dreams will never come true. I thought i will never pray again since there are too many questions without answers. But, Jesus was and is here all the time. My heart is not broken but she is rejoicing. Just because, God has blessed me with wonderful family and friends who love me even with their broken heart. And i know, one day, my dream will comes true, and their hearts will be perfect again. It is a matter of waiting. And i will be waiting, patiently.

Love Is Waiting

2009-05-31T19:42:00.006+08:00

Oh wow, I almost forgot that I actually own a blog :P I am done with my spring semester in ADP Taylors and now Im moving in the short summer semester. Still working on my application to either Liberty University in Virginia, or Texas Tech. So, prayers are always be appreciated :) I'm only taking one subject this semester- statistics, and so far, I am still alive:) Classes are going well and also life too.

I'm helping Missy, a really sweet girl from the States for Subang Connexion. OH! If anyone is interesting in improving your English speaking skills, Subang Connexion will be the exact perfecto place you will wanna be at! There will be really nice Americans and also Malaysians who are willing to talk to you IN ENGLISH, and so you can speak English fluently. There will also be a lot of awesome activities such as frisbee, scavenger hunt, amazing race in downtown KL, coffee house where you get to show your music talent or just come and listen to some great musics, and so on and so on in the student house (same block with MCD which is just next to Asian Cafe, walk straight until you see a dobi, and the student house is just upstair at the third floor). You never know how amazing life can be after joining this big family, and you are warmly welcomed for sure ;)

Lastly, I just cant wait to share a really nice song with you guys. Brooke is a gospel singer, working with hilsongs and her songs are all great stuff. You guys can check them out from Youtube. They are all really pretty and encouraging as well. However, this is my favorite song so far:

Love Is Waiting
By
Brooke Fraser

In the autumn on the ground,
between the traffic and the ordinary sounds
I am thinking signs and seasons while a north wind blows through
I watch as lovers pass me by
Walking stories - whos and hows and whys
Musing lazily on love
Pondering you
I'll give it time, give it space and be still for a spell
When it's time to walk that way we wanna walk it well

[CHORUS:]
I'll be waiting for you baby
I'll be holding back the darkest night
Love is waiting til we're ready, til it's right
Love is waiting

It's my caution not the cold
there's no other hand that i would rather hold
the climate changes, I'm singing for the strangers about you
don't keep time, slow the pace
Honey hold on if you can
the bets are getting surer now that you're my man

[BRIDGE:]
I could write a million songs about the way you say my name
I could live a lifetime with you and then do it all again
and like I can't force the sun to rise or hasten summer's start,
neither should I rush my way into your heart

Hope you guys enjoy the song, and the fun season of the year- IS SUMMER :D

With love,
Joey

Happiness in the midst of CRAZINESS

2009-04-14T19:56:00.003+08:00

April comes in a rather quick pace and i am burried alive under those heavy text books, assignment, research paper, and final exams! I need to grasp some air now:(

Anyway, instead of being frustrated and moody the whole day, i try to slow down my pace, listen to His voice. A psalm a day takes the worries away- quoted by joey yapp. Listen to God's words is really encouraging and they keep my heart peace. Now, im going to share some ways to find Eudaimonia when life is going crazy.

Method number 1:
Never miss morning devotional time even if that means i will have to sacrifice a good 30 minutes sleep. When I feel like sleeping in for another 10 minutes after the alarm went off, I'll say a little prayer in my heart, and that just makes me want to wake up and get ready for the day.

Method number 2:
My goal of the day is smile with everyone who I have eye contact with. The people who you gave a smile with will put a smile not only on your face, but in your heart too. Even though I dont even know most of them, but they just make my day. Awesome right?

Method number 3:
Stop seeking happiness. It comes when you stop finding or creating one. Ever since I let Jesus to take over the pen of my life story, happiness comes every time unexpectedly. And they happen maybe in the corner of the store, in the twinkling of an eye when the lift opened and closed, in the crowded and noisy bus, along the quiet corridor in the library...I am really happy because I did not waste my time to create happiness, but God has plan it all out, and they are beautiful.

Method number 4:
Listen to the songs in my Itune list. I like listening to my playlist cos' I sorted all the songs out in different categories. So when I need some particular songs I will know where exactly to look for. I do wish i have a piano with me now though. So, if you are lucky to have an instrument with you, go get it and make some melody!

Method number 5:
Go on MSN and budge on some of your close friends. Chat in a special way, such as using your-own-kind-of language; talk nonsence but nonsence that actually have some sort sense of humor; or even just send a simile....you make their day, and they will definitely cheer u up too. Let them surprise you!

Method number 6:
This is BIG one. If you are getting more severe, talk to Jesus. Have a good solid quiet time with Him. Even though you are busy, there's no harm to leave out a quiet time with the best Listener of all time, our Savior, the Prince in Heaven. He is my strenght, who make me laugh, make me dance, make me sing! :)

Method number 7:
This is a funny one. Tell your friend and show them how crazy are you, then they will sure help you to call 999. No worries, everything will be taking care of;)

Enjoy, and have fun during the craziness!!!!

With love,
joey

Cry or Smile, your matter of choice ;)

Because He lives

2009-04-12T21:38:00.005+08:00

Do you have eyes but fail to see, have ears but fail to hear?

¹On the first day of the week, very early in the morning, the women took the spices they had prepared and went to the tomb. ²They found the stone rolled away from the tomb, ³but when they entered, they did not find the body of the Lord Jesus. ⁴While they were wondering about this, suddenly two men in clothes that gleamed like lightning stood beside them. ⁵In their fright the women bowed down with their faces to the ground, but the men said to them, "Why do you look for the living among the dead? ⁶He is not here; he has risen! Remember how he told you, while he was still with you in Galilee: ⁷'The Son of Man must be delivered into the hands of sinful men, be crucified and on the third day be raised again.' " ⁸Then they remembered his words.- Luke 24:1-8 (NIV)

Jesus died for our sins and lives again today! Because He lives, we got hope :)

"Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened."- Matthew 7:7-8

Sweet time in A1511

2009-04-11T16:25:00.005+08:00

Im having a good and relaxing time with my house mate, ting ting now. We are so busy with our assignment and also the finals which are just around the corner. Yet, the wonderful soft musics and refreshing rain brightened our day:)

I still remember when I first got here to Ridzuan, i was really sad that i couldn't move into Jing's place with shin yie and her. All i knew was, i was holding this A1511 key in front of a white and pink door. I was afraid at first without knowing that, inside of this sweet house, there are awesome people waiting for me.

I enjoy my time with my housemates a lot. Farah, my washing machine shower buddy; Nas, my jogging party, the best mihun goreng cook; Shaa, the funny and pretty lady who makes me laugh my head off everyday; Chua, the Sabahan with a quiet spirit who is the elder sister for all of us; Ting ting, the princess of the house who me and her share almost every interests together and of course Susan, a friend i knew since 7 years old, my loveliest room mate. They are all the people I enjoy the most by living under the same roof together.

I remember there was a crazy night where all of us got out to the balcony and play fire works. We were crazy, literally! Me and Chua were screaming so hard while everyone was enjoying the most wonderful time together. We were complained by the wardens afterward but who cares. We are young:P Then, we had surpise parties, singing out loud, running in the house, supper eating, etc etc....Although we are from different backgrounds, during the one semester in 2008, we spent quality times together like we knew each other for so long.

However, Nas and Farah my gila left us later on. We are all no good in saying goodbyes....I miss them so much, the laughing time, the crazy time, and also the crying time, i miss you guys! We will have to do a A1511 hang out time in Malaysia when we got the chance. Is a promise! haha!

Dedicate to my housemate:
Farah the gila, Nas the mother, Shaa the happy dippy, Chua the elder sister, Ting ting the picky princess and also Susan the dumb dumb model:)

With love,
joey

There was something special in the air

2009-04-05T22:00:00.004+08:00

There was something special in the air tonight:) My beloved cousin is in a relationship! Finally! Im happy for her...well, im sad as well, that i will have to share yung yung with another people:P

Yung is not only my cousin, but also my very first friend. We went to the same kindergarten, same elementary school and also high school. We did basically everything together. She is the only one i can share my secrets with without hesitating. She is my source of happiness, and also a shelter to hide in during the hard time.

She is always the artist. I enjoy looking at her master pieces. I always endure her weird fashion sense whenever we went shopping! haha! im kidding! We share the same fashion sense:P We cannot do sleep over night, because we will talk non-stop. I mean seriously, we will talk and talk and talk until we dont even know it is already morning!

I remember when she had to go to KL for college, i cried so hard, in front of her. And she cried too. We were both laughin and crying in the same time. I miss that moment. Then, my turn to leave Malaysia. Although we are far apart, and we seldom talk, but once we meet again, we will talk like we see each other every day. That's how special our relationship is:)

I still remember the last time we talked was before she had to leave to NZ. We were talking about how time passed by so quick, how things changes in a snap. And of course we talk about how our love stories will be like. I prayed that night that God will writes her a beautiful love story.

Now that her love story has come true, im so happy for her:) This guy must be very lucky to have yung yung to be his girl! I miss my beloved cousin, yung yung.

True Love Waits :)

My Dark Angel

2009-04-04T22:13:00.004+08:00

Ever since I'm here at Taylors College University for ADP, God is awesome enough to send me angels who put a smile on my face every day. If I ain't got them here with me, i guess my life in Ridzuan will be so dull that i dont even know how to smile.

Anyway, im just going to share one of the angels of mine today. She is special. She put a smile on my face every day but she doesnt seem to smile a lot. However, she got the most beautiful smile ever, trust me. She is cool. She always seems like she got those "dark cloud" on top of her head but that's just her. She is happy i know. She is my source of courage. We did something really crazy yet fun last night. We went all the way to the tallest floor of our block just to see how does it look like. I will be so afraid if i will have to go to that floor alone or even with other people. But, because that's her who was with me, I am as brave as a lion:) We did all source of crazy things together and i love her so much. She doesn't like anyone to help her, but Im always the busy body who want to give her my love and cares. One thing for sure, i know she doesnt mind at all and she loves me too much! :P

What makes me feel special is that, her smile is the most precious thing in the world, yet she gives a smile to me, or even share her laughters with me every day.

My, Angel, Jaime :D

Coffee

2009-04-02T02:17:00.002+08:00

I had a cup of coffee just now...it was like heaven on earth having that nice cup of coffee while I was studying for my Chemistry test just now. However, now it is a disaster.....my eyes, my body, my mind are all so tired right now, yet i cant sleep. I need to wake up early tmrw to catch the 7:40am bus and so i can be at my 8:00am English class on time tmrw. Im dead, seriously dead.

Anyway, the smell of coffee and this starless night remind me of Tawau. I think it is going to rain again soon since i can smell the rain. I remember there were times mom asked me to make her a cup of coffee in those rainy nights. I enjoy making coffee for mom. She always gives me the best critics and teaches me wonderful coffee making skills. I fall in love with coffee because of mommy. The smell of coffee reminds me of her, the joy of my life.

I wonder when can i make another cup of coffee for her. Or, can i still make her coffee? I've been away from home so long, and im going to leave my home even further again soon. Somehow, people always tell me that, this is the process of life. We will eventually leave our home when we grow older. Im excited for the beautiful future yet to come, but im afraid of letting go.

But i know, God has everything taking care of. Micheal, Joy and Adam are always in my heart, even if i have to leave. They are the angels God sent to me, to put a smile on my face each day. Looking at the cup of coffee, is like feeling warm in the winter, joy in the desert. I miss that cup of coffee, me and my family enjoy the most, in the late and cozy nights.

Rain

2009-03-28T16:54:00.003+08:00

"Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer."- Romans 12:12

It is raining again now. It has been raining this few days in Sunway, or Subang, her her, whatever:P I love rain, a lot. I enjoy the sounds of rain, soft music with the cool air, it will double the sweetness if im having a hot chocolateee now.

I had so much fun this morning. I wake up early for my devotional time, and I'm in Psalm 51 today. God has been really faithful this few days when I need Him so much. I've been learning so much to be patient, humbly waiting upon His plan for me. It got really hard some time, but Im glad that God consistently put amazing people into my life to encourage me, a sweet bible reading partner to share my faith with, and also shows me the exact words I need to see in the right time.

I met Missy today. Rebecca has been introducing me to her through facebook and today was the first time we both meet each other. It was super duper awesome! She looks so much like Alyssa! Alyssa, if u are reading this, Im serious, just imagine my serious look on that round face, that's how serious i am now:P They are setting up a student house in Subang and Im so happy to be involved in it. I always wish that i can serve God in such way and so i can be prepared whether or not to involve in missionaries in the future which ive been praying a lot this few months. Im ready! :)

The following weeks are going to be crazy, but just having something to look forward to every day makes me so happy! Im ready for all those giants and Im going to finish this race strong! All the best to you guys too! I hope that everyone will enjoy the weekend, and mostly this beautiful rain:)

Ajarku Berdiam

2009-03-27T00:06:00.004+08:00

Wow, it seems like i've been dissapear from here for quite some time now. The semester has been really hectic and Im amazed that im still here alive now:P

Finals are coming in and I really need to get right into my applications to college soon. I am still not sure what tomorrow leads to but i know for sure Jesus is there:)

I've been learning to be quiet and still this week. God has faithfully putting lessons and people to my life during my learning time. Things changed so much after the previous post. Some of my really close friends start to accept Christ and we have been going to church together for weeks. We are also going to serve in the service together which is really awesome! I still cant believe how fast and wonderful things change but Jesus is powerful, what can i say.

I talked to Icha tonight when i met her in dinner time. It was weird that we were talking about our faith since she is a Muslim and im Christian. But that was one of those greatest talk of all time! I learned so much from her and hopefully she got some out of me too. We even plan to go run together at the park sometime in the evening! That's indeed a good news to me since i've been running alone every since my housemate, Nas went to Australia.

"likewise also that women should adorn themsleves in respectable apparel, with modesty and self-control, not with braided hair and gold or pearls or costy attire, but with what is prper for women who profess godliness-with good works. Let a woman learn quietly with all submissiveness." - 1 Timothy 2:9-11
Song of the day- Ajarku Berdiam by GMB

Love,
joey

Faith and Love

2009-01-18T14:34:00.004+08:00

I am alone in my room now listening to Lincoln Brewster- Amazed. I don't know if you guys ever heard this before, but it is a very nice song. Looking back all these years, I'm amazed by Jesus, by His merciful and infinity love, by His tenderness, and by His faithfulness.

It was just 9 years ago, I went to a Christian function with my mom. I wasn't a Christian at that point of my life. I remember very vividly that, it was that night, I finally realised that Christmas isn't all about presents and Santa, this beautiful earth isn't just occur after a big "bang" and of course the happiest fact is that, my ancestors are not some kind of "monkeys". And then, they went on telling about this Big Guy, He is the Son of God, the God who created the earth, who made me, who is the only living God and this Big Guy named Jesus Christ. According to the speaker, we are all sinners. The world is getting more pervert and so, this living and loving God gave us His only Son, beloved Son, Jesus Christ, and died for us. He also said that whoever believe in Him will be saved and have eternal life in Heaven with God! I was still young that time, but I was already amazed by this love from this Big guy who they were talking about, He did not do anything wrong, yet He who knew no sins died for us! I dont know why, but as a 10-year-old girl that time, I cried like I never cried before. I did not know why I cried, but I heard a little voice came into my heart day very night. I knew my life is going to change, i didnt know how but somehow this sweet voice took away my worries. I raised my hand up without anyone asked me to do, I gave my heart to this Big Guy that night. No one forced me to do it, I did it myself.

After that night, Sundays are not eating breakfast in Dad's favorite restaurant and shopping at the busy street we used to go. We started to go to church and of course I went to Sunday school. I started to know more about this God and of course this Big Guy. I memorised verses very well, I always got stickers for performing well in Sunday School, I always prayed before I went to bed, I always got praises from the adults for being in time to church and singing well during worship time. It seemed like I was growing in my faith, it seemed like I was a true Christian after all. I got my own Bible which I thought it even made me looked more like a Christian. Somehow, I missed the voice that whispered to me that night from a few years ago, even though I went to church already, I felt like I lacked of something, something I encountered that night.

Not until a couple years later, it was a cold winter late night, I woke up from a night mare. I couldnt get used to the new environment I moved to, I couldnt bare the cold I never used to, the worst thing of all, I missed my family who were far away from me. Instead of cried myself to sleep again like I did for the last couple days, I took my Bible out for the very first time since I got to the new place. I remember reading this that night, "every word of God proves true; he is a shield to those who take refuge in him."I cried in joy after i read the Bible like i never read before. I found something new in it, it was not praises from sunday school teachers, it was not stickers and gifts. It is a new life! What i missed out the whole time was NEW LIFE! I kneeled down beside my bed, I said a little simple prayer, I asked Jesus to come into my life again, and teach me how to become a true Christian, the daughter who He delights.

I soon made a lot of friends at a church in that new place. They are people who are different from the others I knew from the past. My old friends and new friends are equally cool but what i meant was, this new friends i made live their life differently. They live as though they are people in hope. They never seem to worry about tomorrow. They smile, laugh and just being happy although time was hard. They worship God with their true heart and each of them have a special relationship with our Savior. The more I be with them, the more we talk, I soon found my own way to build a personal relationship with Jesus. My life started to change termendously. I gave up what the world asked me to persue, I turn my heart only to Jesus. I found a new faith, a new life, and all these came from a loving God.

Even when I got back to my hometown, God continue to bless me with awesome friends, sisters in Christ and brothers in Christ. My journey has been really beautiful with His love. While i'm unaware, Jesus has been doing a lot of amazing things in my life. Even when there were times which were low and i was afraid that i might just wouldnt get through them, Jesus always places wonderful friends to my life who I can talk to, His words always lift me up, His love is never end.

How deep,
How wide,
How great,
Is Your Love for me.

In Christ,
Joey

New Year

2009-01-05T13:16:00.002+08:00

Here I am again. Back to Sunway, back to Taylors. I just got back yesterday and I already miss Tawau, my family and friends back home. I lost my purse during the flight yesterday, such a bummer. Everything just doesn't seem to go right when i just get pumped up to roll in this brand new year.

Just got off talking with my precious "sister" Alyssa. So, she doesnt want to go to Liberty University anymore. It did made me sad for a while. I wish we can both go to Liberty together. The more i read about this school, the more i get attached to it. Liberty seems like the school i always dream to go to although LU does sounds a little bit conservative for most of my friends and espcially Alyssa (HA!), LU still is my dream school.

My journey starts to be a bit harder now. I have to get right in to the application progress, not knowing what tomorrow leads to make me feel miserable. I dont know if I need to apply to any other school except for LU alone. I want to go to LU because of the environment and stuff but going to a totally new place for me is an overwheming decision to make. I still remember that very first time I was in Northwest High school, new faces, new surroundings, it just gives me goosebump whenever i think about it. But I shouldn't worry about anything right now. He, the mighty one is in control after all.

I am still waiting for Yi Juin to pick me up to the police station to make a report. She is such an awesome friend. I hope everything will go smooth and i'll get a copy of IC and so i can go home for Chinese New Year in 3 weeks time. I listened to another series of talk from Louie Giglio just now. I've been enjoying listening to his talk ever since i went to Passion conference last year. He shared about the story of Ashley again in this talk- "Hope when life hurts most". I cried once again to see how merciful our Savior is. Lord Jesus, you always take my breath away with your mercy and grace!

I need to change for this new year. I need to build up a good relationship with my Prince in Heaven, to be set apart from this world. I woke up early this morning and had a great quiet time with my awesome Savior. Im not a morning person but getting up early and have a nice devotional time does help me focus my life to Jesus and start off my day right.

I'm going to stop worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be another blessed day with Him, my Sheperd. Year 2009, here I come! :)

40God had planned something better for us so that only together with us would they be made perfect. - Hebrews 11:40

Christmas

2008-12-24T23:58:00.003+08:00

Is Christmas time!!!!:) I decided to come home for Christmas this year and so i can spend this wonderful season with my beloved family and friends here in Tawau, a place i grew up with, my home town....this might be the last one for years since I am going to the States for college if it is God's will....therefore, this time is a special and memorable one...

Christmas started to be special for me ever since i knew Jesus....He is the greatest gift you can ever think of....I hope that everyone is enjoying this beautiful Christmas and we are all celebrating the birth of Christ together in joy:)

Hereby to share this awesome song i heard from church that other night:

We Are The Reason

As little children
We would dream of Christmas morn
Of all the gifts and toys
We knew we'd find
But we never realized
A baby born one blessed night
Gave us the greatest gift of our lives

We were the reason
That He gave His life
We were the reason
That He suffered and died
To a world that was lost
He gave all He could give
To show us the reason to live

As the years went by
We learned more about gifts
The giving of ourselves
And what that means
On a dark and cloudy day
A man hung crying in the rain
All because of love, all because of love

I've finally found the reason for living
It's in giving every part of my heart to Him
In all that I do every word that I say
I'll be giving my all just for Him, for Him

He is my reason to live

Merry Christmas Ya-ll!!!!! :D

Love,
Joey

Beloved

2008-12-15T00:27:00.003+08:00

This is going to sound a little bit weird for some of you or even most of you, but i fall in love, deeply in love with Him who loves me more than anything else. I know most of my friends are going to think i'm crazy, but for the first time, I've forgot what the world thinks, they can have everything, but give me Him, my Beloved. He became the Lover of my soul, not in a fleshly or physical way, but rather at the spiritual depths of my being, with all reverence and respect.This love story did not happen merely because of good fortune, it did not occur simply because I happened to be in the right place at the right time. This beautiful romance was made possible by something that lies within the grasp of every young women.

I knew Him since I was 12. He isn't a great friend for most of our family members but one thing for sure, He loves every single one in my family. He isn't the center of the chatters between me and most of my friends, but He is always somewhere around, guiding me through my relationships with others. I have to admit that He wasn't the main focus in my life, but I'm always the apple of His eyes. He doesn't tell me jokes that burst me into laughter, but He sings songs that are awesome enough to cheer me up. He doesn't buy nice dresses or jeweleries to make me pretty, but He tells me how beautiful I am by His love letters from the Book of Life. He doesn't give me flowers and diamonds to remind me over and over again how deep is His love for me, but He loves me so much that He who knew no sins died for my sins.

Tonight, I see Him again, waiting patiently for me. He never gives up on me, for better or for worst, forever He will be there for me. I dropped to my knees, broke down in tears. I've been running away too far and I miss Him so much that I can never imagine. Yet, He still told me that it is never too late to come back to Him. For that very moment I'm in His arms, I fall in love....deeply in love with this prince charming, the knight in shining armor.

"Let the beloved of the LORD rest secure in him, for he shields him all day long, and the one the LORD loves rests between his shoulders." - Deuteronomy 33:12

I love you, Jesus.

P.S. inspired by Tenth Avenue North- Beloved (a very sweet love song)

Joey

Witnessing

2008-10-28T21:38:00.004+08:00

I've been learning a lot ever since I decided to pick up the cross for Jesus. And I'm more than happy to be in His service and learning so much from Jesus. The lesson lately is witnessing. I've been sharing the gospel with some close friends. It has been up and down. I remember how depressing it was when the gospel are told but there's no responds from the listener. And then I will be really upset on myself thinking "what if I said that...", "what if i dont say that first"...etc and everything will be different and my friends that i shared with will accept Christ in their life immediately. However, i recognised this is the lesson of patient God entrusted to me as well. He is the one who is working with their heart, I'm the one who bringing Jesus in to their life and the holy spirit will work it all out. I'm learning and amazed by the lessons God put in this journey of me walking in the sovereign will.

I read Adam, my precious brother's blog today and found that he is actually facing the same kind of problem as well. He even wrote a song for his friend and I was touched by his words. I gonna attach here but it is all in Chinese. I will translate later for sure;)

好想好想和你在一起, I wish I can be with you,
一起细读神写的圣经, Reading God's word(Bible) together,
静静聆听他的声音, Listening to His voice quietly,
好想好想和你在一起, I wish I can be with you,
一起宣扬真正的真理, Share the only true and good news together,
肩并肩抵挡坏势力, Facing the evils together.

好想好想, 好想好想 I truely wish, truely wish,
好想好想神选的是你, Truely wish that God will choose you,
依然祷告不停, I'm still praying like always,
让神介入友情, Let's God be in this friendship,
让每一个日子 Let's everyday,
都串连成我们最美丽 Become beautiful for us.
最美丽的友情. as our beautiful friendship.

好想好想一切都暂停, I wish time can stop running,
别再假装不明不介意, Please don't act like you don't understand, you don't care,
彼此听听彼此的心. Listen to what my heart is gonna tell you.

好想好想, 好想好想 I truely wish, truelt wish,
好想好想神选的是你, Truely wish that God will choose you,
依然祷告不停, I'm still praying like always,
让神介入友情, Let's God be in this friendship,
让每一个日子 Let's everyday,
都串连成我们最美丽 Become beautiful for us.
最美丽的友情. as our beautiful friendship.

好想好想, 好想好想 I truely wish, truelt wish,
好想好想神选的是你, Truely wish that God will choose you,
依然祷告不停, I'm still praying like always,
让神介入友情, Let's God be in this friendship,
让每一个日子 Let's everyday,
都串连成我们最美丽 Become beautiful for us.
最美丽的友情. as our beautiful friendship.

Brother, im proud of you. This gonna be a great song and I can't wait to play it in the piano. I'll be praying for your friend and your spiritual growth as well. I love you more than I can say!

Hope you guys enjoy the words like I did. :)

"For I am not ashamed of the gospel, for it is the power of God for salvation to everyone who believes, to the Jew first and also to the Greek.-Romans 1:16)

Love,
joey

Sweet Sweet Suday

2008-10-26T19:17:00.003+08:00

This morning was a special day for me. Susan and Fiona went to church with me!!! It has been sometime and prayers for this and i'm glad that God's plan according to His timing is always perfect for us.

We are in book of 1 Samuel now and the message for today was "Conform to God's Agenda" (1 Samuel 24). As most of us know the story is about how King David did not kill Saul instead he waited for God's right timing. As an application for that, we should be patient and lay our faith in God's plan. I found that it was the perfect message i have to listen to. Thank God that You made me listened to this sermon in the exact right timing:) I was and still am always waiting for something, either for a relationship, school, dream, and some time i just couldnt understand why should I go through all these seems like never ending waiting. Yet, there's a saying from uncle Henry which really moved me: "If God did everything according to our prayers immediately for us, we will never grow." It is so true that the waiting(s) upon the Lord are not a waste. The waiting period is where God wants us to prepare ourselves for the wonderful blessings in the time will come. Oh, there's another saying which I always like is: "God maybe slow but He is never late." Nonetheless, God wants us to be patient as patient is one of the fruit of spirit God laid in our lives. (James 1:4)

There's a lot of blessings in my life where they require waiting. I know He got a plan for me and it will be the best one for me.(Jeremaih 29:11) I cant see why I dont wanna wait for His blessings in His right timing:)

To sum up, my time in waiting draw me nearer to my Sheperd. Today has been sweeter than yesterday and I know for sure tomorrow will be better! How great is our God that I feel like i fall in love with Jesus more and more each day:)

I'm listening to John Waller- "while I'm waiting". Is a good song and i hope u guys will enjoy it:)

"I will serve You and worship You while I'm waiting."

With Love,
Joey

Patience

2008-10-04T01:58:00.008+08:00

I was listening to the Counrtyside bible Church's Wednesday night college group sermon tonight when my friends decided to hang over at my place. We talked some and of course like always, i hope that through what i spoke, i might bring Jesus into their life. Sadly, the way i shared the gospel was like, "so guys, fastened your seat belts, i'm going a little fast here, I want you allto get saved like right now!" That wasn't what God wants it to be, that was a Joey's way of sharing the gospel. So, whenever im bumped into the surface and haven't yet go in deeper, they are already wanna "leave the cabin and never ever come back again".

Tonight, after they were all in the bed, i thought of getting online. I met Colin, and we talked. He pointed out the way I shared the gospel in the wrong timing. For me, it is like, they are expecting a fruit salad for appetizer but i threw them a big fried chicken chop with mashed potatoes and broccoli for sides which is more than enough for just appetizer. We were reading 2 Peter 1 today. I wasn't concentrate at first so i decided to pray and read again. This few verses were like a wakening alarm for me.

5Do your best to improve your faith. You can do this by adding goodness, understanding, 6self-control, patience, devotion to God, 7concern for others, and love.

I wasn't patient. In fact, I dont have perserverance. Neither at school nor sharing the gospel. All i had in my mind were, rush, rush, and rush. And that reflected too that i'm not humbling myself at all to seek God for guidance. I was stuffing them with big meals during appetizer and by the time they got to the main course, they are already full or they dont even care about the main course whatsoever. I was wrong, very wrong indeed. I prayed for forgiveness and also give thanks for what Jesus has done in my life. For sending me to a far far country,USA to seek back His lost sheep, me; For sending me lots of godly friends that can walk with me in this journey to support me and encourage each other in faith; and for sending me the Words that will enchance my faith. I'm content with my life. nothing to complain since i got Jesus:)

If i chose to cry myself to sleep and being stuck up just now, i will be still the old boastful joey who put herself above everything....But, im glad that i seek God first and get back to the Words. Im nothing for Jesus but He saved me with His mercy and love....Man, it just blown me off whnever i think about it....Jesus, what can i say, I love U!:)

Learning to have patience,
Joey

I Kissed Dating Goodbye

2008-10-02T01:38:00.007+08:00

So ya...you guys might be thinking now..."JOEY is quiting dating???!!! NO WAY!!!!"...well ya, be frank, that was what I told myself when I am told to read this book from Joshua Harris, "I kissed dating goodbye".

After all this years being in premature romances ended in heartbreaks(what i mean here is "falling in love" if u will say, merely dating), I started to wonder if God even care about providing me a boy friend soon. But then, I realise now that it isn't God that i can blame of, but it is me who brought all those worthless tears in lonely nights. Looking back to the past, I soon see that every hurtful experiences came from "just friendship". Being "just friends" is just plain confusing. Romance runs in my veins, and it's not always easy to restrain. I always struggle to keep myself from stepping into something more.(P.S. if u done reading this book,you will certainly find the ways of being "just friends" can be just awesome:D)

The problem which seems to always bothering me is that, i know im not ready for any commitment with any guys yet. By living a different life from where I used to live, I discovered so many others stuff that i enjoy to do in order to serve Christ our Savior in my single time. And now, I know, when God knows you're ready for the responsibility of commitment, He will reveal the right person under the right circumstances. The waiting will definitely seems to be "never-ever-have-an-end" or depressing, but When will we find it? the answer is TRUST ME(JESUS);How will we find it? The answer again is, TRUST ME. Whether you're single or married, whether you are liked, loved, or lonely, the key of commitment is TRUST.

Our heart is always the killer. "The heart is deceitful above all things.."we read in Jeremiah 17:9. Though the advice of many well-meaning people today is to "follow your heart", the Bible warns that your heart can lead u in wrong, even dealy, directions. There's a song i enjoy so much from my favorite band, named "your heart never lies" but sadly, be frank, our hearts lie. Something can "feel" right and completely wrong. The right thing in the wrong time is still the wrong thing. We are the Keepers of Our hearts. We need to consistently evalutate the purity of our hearts in prayers, asking God to reveal the little things that contaminate us. As God revelas our wrong attitudes, longings, and destires, we must remove them from our hearts. Instead of complaining about the lonely years that I have, I thank God that i haven't yet been into any girls and boys relationship. I'm glad that I haven't give my first kiss away yet or even holding hands with a guy.

This is a good book to read and so im sharing it here with u guys. I find that this book isn't about dating at all, but about following Christ and what that means to all our relationships with others, whether romantic or not. God lovingly blesses us with human relationships, but He first calls us to find our heart's delight in Him. And now, im saying "im kissing dating goodbye"...I really don't need another heartbreak moment and tears pouring nights. I want to wait upon Jesus instead. I'll lift up every things in prayers and treat every guys in my life now as brothers in Christ. It is easier to say then to be done. But I have faith in Him and I choose to follow Him. I am also telling to myself now,"when i felt lonely, i would think, God is calling me back to Him."

That's all for tonight. If u guys are interested, "I kissed dating Goodbye" by Joshua Harris is available in Popular Bookstore. It costed me RM36.80 but it worths more than anything else. Night all~!

Blessings,
Joey

Blessings in the Hard Time

2008-09-22T01:25:00.005+08:00

Is 1:10a.m now. I wish I am in the bed now instead of still staying up late typing this post of the day. Just got off from the phone with my precious brother, Adam. The way he spoke, the way he dealed with everything, I was so amazed that he is not that little zai zai(younger brother) anymore. He has grown up spiritually. A lot. It was a great talk and I felt blessed to have a brother like him.

I was kinda moody in all that happen today. Life has been really different ever since i'm not just a shadow of Christian but being a true Christian who is faithful to her Savior, learning to obey God in all that she does and walking patiently in His will everyday. Friends from the past can't accept who I am now and I totally fine with that. In fact, we as the followers of Christ are meant to be persecuted. It is just that, i was sad because they are friends that i love so much. I wish I could had do better than that but I know everything is in God's hands.

I felt better after talking to Adam though. He told me that i'm not alone, instead of the Lord Savior who will stand right beside me, I got this precious little brother who will always support me. He is going through the same thing in his life now and he is standing strong with the armor of God. Man, i wish i could had at least half of his confidents in Christ. His life has been different ever since God shown the mercy on him last year when he was facing the heart disease he had. We glad that God put trials and hardships in our life though, coz there're places where God blessed us with greater stuff as well! Thank you Jesus!!

I think i should go to sleep, with a smile. Here's the verses which come to my mind right now and i'll like to share it here. "if we endure, we will also reign with him; if we deny him, he also will deny us; if we are faithless, he remains faithful, for he cannot deny himself- 2 Timothy 12-13"

Blessings,
Joey

The Soundtrack

2008-09-20T20:58:00.003+08:00

I was watching this series of talks in "Soundtrack" from Louie Gigleo on Youtube. They were about everyone of us are playing a role in God's story. And this story needs a soundtrack, and we are the songs in it. The song of redeemed and also the song to share the gospel to others. Louie is always a good speaker and I encourage you guys to look the video clips up in youtube. Type in "welcome to the story of God by Louie Gigleo" and u will be able to find the other talks as well. They are awesome and encouraging.

So after I watched most of the talks, I came out with another new song!!!! I wish I have a piano here in my dorm room. Then I can record it and post it here. But God blesses me with a phone which has a voice recorder in it, so I sang the song and wrote the words down. I'll complete the whole song when I go back to Tawau. However, I'm thinking of asking Yena to play the song for me in guitar on Monday. That probably will be a good idea as well. So guys, here's how this song goes!

The Soundtrack

I got this melody, running in my head,

I wanna sing to the King, with this song I had,

The story of God still playing,

I’m taking my part in,

Can someone press the play for it?

The soundtrack will begin.

Jesus, your love saved me from the dreadful sins,

Thank you for the part U let me play,

My life is for U no matter how it ends,

The story will be great.

I know, I know, I know,

From Your words I learned,

I sing, I sing, I sing,

Praise you my mighty king!

Amazing Love, how can it be?

You saved a wretch like me.

I once was lost but now am found,

Was blind, but now I see.

Amazing grace, I received.

The soundtrack of Your story,

Is where I’ll be.

I'll post the melody up as soon as it's done! God bless!

Love,

Joey

God of this City

2008-09-17T12:51:00.000+08:00

Just woke up. Today has been so different from every other mornings i had have here in Sunway. Ever since i came here, i had never woke up happily like i did just now. I'm not a city girl neither will i love city life. I came from a small town named,Tawau, where sounds of birds and morning breeze are the first things to welcome me in the morning. Mornings in Sunway were just really different. Cars, lot's of people, the Quran readings(muslims), the city was and still is always busy. However, after i was fully awake, i was sitting on my bed, looking out to this city of God through the window beside me. The sky is so pretty as i never see before, or maybe that's because i never ever pay attention for it until now. The buildings are equally and nicely built in, the highways, the cars.......even though they look totally the other way around from where i came from, they are equally amazing! Listening to the Quran readings which i have no idea what it means, instead of complaining about it, I found it special to be at here. It just reflected the fact that I'm not belong to here at all, but God put me here for a purpose. And then i started to sing this song which i fall in love with when i went to Passion KL last time.

You're the God of this city, You're the King of these people
You're the Lord of this nation, You are
You're the Light in this darkness, You're the Hope to the hopeless
You're the Peace to the restless, You are

There is no one like our God, there is no one like our God

For greater things have yet to come, and greater things are still to be done in this city
Greater things have yet to come, and greater things are still to be done in this city

Greater things have yet to come, and greater things are still to be done here
"God Of This City" led by Chris Tomlin and written by Bluetree

I found the lyrics to be incredibly inspiring and hopeful for my time here in Sunway, Malaysia. That's why i'm sharing this song now here and so we can shout together: "Greater things have yet to come, and greater things are still to be done in this city!"

The city of Sunway (a scene from my room)
Every creations of God can be so beautfiful when u look at them with the Pure Heart.

Give me Jesus

2008-08-28T23:16:00.000+08:00

Listening to "give me Jesus" by Jeremy Camp now....i love the lyrics, "you can have all this world, just give me Jesus...." No one can comfort my heart right now, except for Jesus....

College started a week ago.....Things got real hectic as time goes by....Assignments, grades, financial, things from no where seems to be rushing into my life at the same time....tonight, i finally get to the point where i coulndt bare it on myself anymore....It wont be real helpful when mom called an hour ago, pushing me hard on choosing the dates to go home and also looking up when is the holidays for Chinese new year...then she dragged on with how the flight ticket's price went high up and then to the normal yet crazy routine they are having back home....i got this full mind of getting my english assignment done, so i couldnt concentrate in our conversation....and what happen next was, we kinda had a show down through the phone....

She must be real sad by now....it was my fault.....i couldnt focus because of what i had in my mind, i have to admit that, im not in the center of the will of God anymore....i got stress out easily of making good grades in classes, getting great GPA and so i can get scholarship to Liberty U. Instead of putting my faith in Lord and so i can find new strength, I kinda did it on my own way, getting over plan for myself.....And when i gone astray, there I'll lost my patience, get angry easily and then broke down in tears....

I have to rearrange my thoughts now... "For this reason I remind you to kindle afresh the gift of God which is in you through the laying on of my hands-2 Timothy 1:6" I have to keep my faith to grow stronger each day. And if you guys are reading this, please do pray for me and so i can be disciplined, stay focus on who I am now and what I am doing is for the will of God, is not about me. I have to put my faith in Him, and also know that He who is the greatest of all, will provide. Thanks.

"When I am alone, Give me Jesus"

Made to Worship

2008-08-16T02:16:00.001+08:00

Finally im done with my first orientation at Taylor's ADP. I was real early because I got on the earlier bus and so I can be at the Purple Box Theather on time. I met this real sweet girl named Liew Yi Juin. We were talking in English at first since i assume her to be just another "banana"(chinese who can only speak English but not their mother tongue). However, we were breaking into laughters after we realised that we were actually graduated from Chinese school and we can both write and speak in Chinese! And by the time we were laughing our head off, a girl named Li Wen joined us. So, eventually, we became really close and we shared a lot of things together.

I was worry at first that I will be the only person who did not go to school for eight months by now and Im definitely not in a good shape for school. Luckily, everyone is just the same there. They are either just graduted from A-lvl or STPM and have been waiting to come to ADP for eight months as well. However, the majority of freshman there are on scholarships from the goverment which made me felt nervous as well. They looked so smart!

Anyway, I met another girl named Lena and she is from Sandakan! We talked a lot and it just brought back all the sweet old memories from my home ,Tawau. Then i met this cool Korean girl who i cant recall her name now but I promise i will figure it out on Monday because she is awesome!

The big thing for today is, Casyie came back from Tawau! She is sad though but Jing and i did glad that she is back. She brought the things that Mindy's sent me! I cant wait for my dinnet tomorrow, there's nothing better than MACERONI AND CHEESE! Thanks Mindy!

Im listening to the CD-"WOW Hits 2008" Mindy sent me now. The first song is "Made to worship" by Chris Tomlin. For me, this song comes down to the lyric, "He has filled our hearts with wonder..." "we walk in the wonder and awe of God. Everything in us rises up to worship God out of this wonder. God made us that way...to see the wonder of how great He is and to stand in wonder at the cross." I love how this song relates to my life right now. God has filled my heart with wonder. And it just makes me want to get on my piano or any instrument right now and sing to worship Him, the wonderous God! God chose us even before the foundation, He wrote the story of His love for everyone! Even the rocks want to call out for His glorious name, so wouldn't you just want to stand up and worship Him for that? And in the matter of fact, we are all made to worship!!!:D

Ahh...I feel so happy right now. Now that i got so hyper, I have no idea how am i going to fall asleep. But, tomorrow is the lucky Saturday where i dont have stuff to do, i guess i can just sleep in then:P Today is the first page of my college life, and i hope that i can still stay on His will, continue to grow in my faith!

"1Finally, my dear friends, since you belong to the Lord Jesus, we beg and urge you to live as we taught you. Then you will please God. You are already living that way, but try even harder."- 1 Thessalonians 4:1

The Big Day

2008-08-15T01:07:00.001+08:00

Furby thought this is a good picture of me.

Yung was showing off her three hundred bucks Fossil Watch!:P

Joey and the birthday girl, Furby the lovely cousin!

Chien, my number 2 lovely cousin!

All of us before saying goodbyes!:(

Is 01:08a.m now, and I"m still up, writing a post. Man, i wish im in bed now. I got this big day tomorrow, my first day of school. It's gonna be an oreintation for Freshman but I do have to take an English replacement test during the session too. And that is why im still up now probably....

I woke up really early today. Jing, me and two of Jing's friends went to the national museum this morning. I love being at that musuem actually. We took a lot of pictures and we did learn a lot as well. We were talking a moment ago that Cikgu Nofian should so take all of us here right before the SPM test. And that we can all take Sejarah down. Well, it was a fun "a day in the musuem".

After that, I rushed back to Sunway Pyramid to meet up my cousins. We had a blust. It had been so long we did not see each other. It was Furby's birthday as well and we had a great lunch at Nando's. I'm the youngest among them and i always love to be the youngest. Why? well, u got full attentions, nice food, free meals, just about every awesome stuff u can think of! ha! It was hard to say goodbye though. They gonna continue to have fun without me since I have to go to school tomorrow. Anyway, I did glad that they came here to cheer me up and had fun with me for my last freedom of the day.

Then, i went for dinner with the church friends. It was awesome, we had a great talk and they are all really nice. I came home kinda late though, that's why i kinda had a show down with my mom through the phone. I could'nt concentrate while im reading the bible tonight. I got so much in my mind. I'm worry about the test tomorrow, and how can I settle those fees without my parents here. I have no idea how my classes go, or how will they arrange for my class schedule. I have no clue about the semester system in Taylors either. Man! How can i deal with these question marks im having now in order to go to bed peacefully.

WELL, i guess i will have to pray and lift up everyting to Jesus. Things which are impossible for us are possible to Him after all. So, i think that's it for today. Will have to wake up at 6:45am tomorrow and that will definitely be a hard core for me who is still on the line right now. *sigh*

Night, all!

An ordinary day with an extraordinary life

2008-08-07T01:59:00.000+08:00

Today was just another ordinary day with an extraordinary life. Life has been extraordinary ever since I found the grace of God, for He has given us, His only child, Jesus Christ who have know no sins died for our sins on the cross. So, today was just another blessed day.

Just got off from bible readings. Having a quiet moment with our Lord Jesus Christ everyday definitely helps a lot especially since I'm far away from home, going to be a freshman in college. College life can be real fascinating like what I discovered so far, but it can be a dangerous place to loose my faith if im not hanging on with the powerful words too.

Anyway, we were on Philipians chapter 2 tonight. I love verse 15 the most since it reflected the way I should be for now. "that you maybe blameless and innocent, children of God without blemish in the midst of a crooked and twisted generation, among whom you shine as lights in the world"

Also for verse 16,"holding fast to the word of life, so that in the day of Christ I maybe proud that I did not run in vain or labor in vain". College will be the best place to share the gospel, where I can meet all kind of people in my age. It can be a tough thing to do too, putting down the ego, learn to be humble, trying not to be too "crazy", and also not ashamed to be called as a Jesus freak, I definitely need prayers for this.

Verse 14 was a good one too. "Do all things without grumbling or questioning". To be frank, I'm a whimp. I happen to stop and ask God am I on the right track eventhough i know for sure, this is God's will. I will have to learn to say YES to Lord, I will never fail the task He has given me if I stay with Him as verse 13 said, "for it is God who works in you, both to will and to work for His good pleasure".

Great lessons today...and i think that's it....have to wake up pretty early tomorrow for the dental appointment with Jing....the good thing is, we got the oppoertunity to go to University of Malaya...will see hows that goes!

"Yes, Lord"

2008-08-04T15:17:00.001+08:00

Today is the fourth day I'm in KL, away from my home, Tawau. I seems to be dealing really well with the stay here, better than what I was imagining back then. I got friends that love me so much, taking care of me, helping me out and be with me no matter what. I can't imagine life without yie jing and shin yie here in KL. The greatest blessings of all, I got Jesus Christ with me! I love how He plans things out perfectly for me like always, thank you Jesus!

So, I went to Passion with Yie Jing, Samuel, Silvi and Fredrick last night. I still remember, right after I got my mind set up to attend Passion, Jing's and Shin Yie's names came up to me. I know for sure, Passion will be the exact right place to go, Louie is the exact right person to listen to for them who are still unbelievers. Unfortunately, shin yie has to go back to Tawau the day before Passion and i can only bring jing with me. I even bought the ticket for her, I pray every night ever since I invited her, and so God will do something awesome that night for her.

Passion was definitely the greatest Christian event of all time. We were touched by the beautiful songs from Chris Tomlin and Charlie Hall. I love how Louie asked us to pray in a group of three. However, for us, we prayed in five. Since I was sitting in the middle, Fredrick asked me to pray for us. I was thinking,"Dang, i don't know if I can do this." But then, Louie did say that God doesnt amazed by great prayers, He will only amazed by the faith of our heart. So, I took a deap breath and we hold hands in prayers. Jing's hand was cold. She looked at me in a way i never encounter before. I knew that she is not ready to pray yet, she doesn't even know who Jesus is. So, I looked at her and told her that, it is ok if u are not ready. She hold my hand anyway, and i felt confident all of the sudden. I started of on how awesome God is and the uncondition love Jesus Christ has given us eventhough we do not deserve them in our first prayer. For the second prayer, Louie asked us to pray for Jesus to be with us tonight, and I thought of Jing, and so, I mentioned Jing in our prayer. I don't know what will Jing be thinking right at that moment, but i know for sure, i had planted the seed and now God will do the rest.

Louie is a really good speaker. I love it when he shared the story on this party girl, who had commited with every sins u can think of, and how she found the grace of God, repented and be a Christian. I couldn't help shaking and crying thinking of the love and salvation Jesus Christ has pour out for everyone of us. Is free, is huge, is incredible...and it's so alive...is there, waiting for us to receive it!

The one thing that I love the most from Louie's sharing is the verse, Isaiah 26:8-"Yes, Lord, walking in the way of Your Truth, we wait eagerly for You, for Your name and Your renown are the desire of our souls." As soon as I thought of this, the thing that I just did an hour ago pop up in my mind now. I was at home waiting for Jing to come home when she called to ask me to go to her school instead. I never walk to her school from our place before, even never did I see the road before. All i knew was, "turn right as soon as u got to the entrance of our place, walk straight, u will see a small gate. Go through the gate, walk straight again until you see a big gate. Then u will have to pass by two high way and u will see the school building." At that moment, I was thinking, man, how can i do this, i dont have a friend that is going with me, I have no clue about how the gates and roads look like, and the worst thing is, sometime, i just happen to have a Joey way of left and right. Somehow, I said yes to Jing. I knew I can make it there, and all my friends were waiting me there.

So, I hold on to my umbrella, my pepper spray, everything that I could think of to protect myself. I stuck with the directions Jing gave me, be alert of every strangers i encountered. My heart was pumping so fast, i scared, i worry...what might happen if I messed up the directions, or someone will kidnap me(i'm crazy, u guys can just ignore this), or even knocked by a car(this sounds crazier :P) However, i made it at last. I saw everyone of them who loves me and waiting patiently for me! We had a great dinner together.

It somehow related to the passage (Isaiah 26:8) and my life now. I just got here, KL for the college. I'm lost sometime, in the midst of choosing the best way, the right college, making new friends, settle into the new environment.....Sometime, I just cant help myself asking, Lord, is this the way u want me to be? Am I doing it right? Will I fall down and get myself into troubles and You are not there for me? And now then I realise that God has left a bible for us, a guide, a torch light for us walking in the way of His truth, why will I still feel insecure? I know, no matter how hard, how long, how things got crazy in this whole journey of the sovereign will, my destiny will be with Jesus in the Heaven! How lucky am I, that a wretch like me, has chosen by Him to be His daughter!

Im confident with every walk of my life now. Im going to say YES to Lord no matter what He is asking. Adam once told me this,"When God's anwer is a NO, we have to give God the big, warm smile just like the one we gave Him when He provided." Yeah, Adam's right, God has the greatest plan for us that we can never imagine, why dont I just stick with Him. There's no better place to be than in the center of God's will in our lives. Anytime Lord, I'm ready!

I can't wait to get my school started, and will see what God wants me to do next:D

True Worship

2008-07-27T20:32:00.000+08:00

Dad: Bao, I heard that you are going out with your friends.
Joey: Ya
Dad: You know, i heard that from mom. I was thinking to bring u guys out for supper.
Joey: Oh.
Dad: Yeah......you are leaving this Thursday right?
Joey: Ya.
Dad: You dont want to talk now, do u?
Joey: Ya.(Trust me, I just woke up from a nap. I cant talk nor think at those time)
Dad: Okay, Bao, U have to wake up and get ready for your friends' gathering though.
Now I felt guilty...Before he step right out his room, yeah, i slept at my parents' room, I told him i wanna join them instead of my friends. Then, he was walking down the stairs humming the same sweet old song which i always like to listen to. And, trust me, he is not happy because I chose them over my friends, is just that His "plan A" did work out. Read the conversation above again, and u will know how my dad traps me and adam to go out with them. I chose to get cheated since im leaving in four days.....The thing I like about Micheal, Joy, and Adam is, we are a FAMILY....I wanna spend quality time with the people that I love the most.....

ANYWAY, go back to the title- True Worship. So, it is Sunday again, the day that I love the most! However, my sleeping time are a mess.....i slept at 5a.m and I usually sleep in on the next day....I did go to bed at 12am last night knowing that it's gonna be a church day today. But I had a hard time falling asleep!!!!!! I counted the sheeps, million times, I read the bible, I listened to Mcfly over and over again, I talked to myself, and when I finally fall asleep was the time i heard the Muslim's prayer-4 to 5am ish. And the result of all that, I couldnt wake up early for church!!!!!

I can't concentrate when we were singing, and during the opening prayers, if I did not try to hold myself back, I might just fall asleep right away..That's how sleepy was I, and THATS SO WRONG!!! So, I tried real hard to concentrate and I prayed that God can keep me awake troughout the service.

The sermon for today was about true worship. Like always, God was talking to me through His words AGAIN! To truly have a grasp on what true worship is, we first have to build a close relationship with Lord Jesus Chirst by having a strong faith. Going to church every Sundays, attending youth group or family fellowships once a week, are not good enough for a genuine relationship with God. "consequently, faith comes from hearing the message, and the message is heard through the word of Christ-Rom. 10:17". No doubt, to be closer to our awesome, living God, we got to stick with His words EVERYDAY. And there's where we learn to be a true worshiper as well.

Futhermore, God wants us to be humble. "Therefore, whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.-Matt.18:4" Our Lord, Jesus Christ wants us to be humble like children. For the matter of fact, God will only use us when we humble ourselves. "For whoever exalts himself will be humbled, and whoever humbles himself will be exalted.-Matt.23:12". When we are low in spirit, there's where we can worship God with our pure heart, and by that, our souls rejoice in God, that's the true worship!

To sum up the day, the best instrument to give glory to our exalted God is our HEART. What is in your heart reflects your worship. "God is spirit, and his worshipers must worship in spirit and in truth"-John 4:24.

I'm as happy as a king now. Knowing that I am saved, I will be in the heaven someday enjoy the best things I can never think of right now, I feel loved and I cant help myself to sing and praise God!! The prayers of the week will be:
1. no more sleepy Sundays
2.makes me a good servant of God
3. to have a pure heart worship and serve Him!

:D

Endless Love

2008-07-24T01:44:00.000+08:00

I wrote a song again!!!! But this time is special, i cant get on my piano, i sang the whole song and recorded it....I gonna go to yung yung's house to play it with the piano, and im thinking of asking shue shue for help in the violin part...will see how that work out!

So, this song is called "Endless Love"..inspired? by my family's clothes! haha! i was washing those clothes and the melody just came....I feel loved from my papa, mama , adam, friends and the great, and awesome DAD and Jesus Christ...."so now faith, hope and love abide, these three, but the greatest of these is love"-1 Cor. 13:13

Endless Love
G
When I'm lost,
C
When I fall,
G D
my soul waits, for God alone,
G
And through the prayers,
C
I see the door,
Em D
I knock and you open the door!
G Em C D
O Lord, You are awesome and now I sing and praise You All Mighty King,
G Em
I pray You use me as Your tool,
C G
O Lord, please strenghtens me!
G Em
Your steadfast love is all I need,
C D
and to Your name I give glory,
G Em
I will sing and praise you for the rest of the days,
C D G
for the Endless Love You've given on the Cross!

Ha! im listening to my song again with my gawky voice now!

Never Turning Back

2008-07-22T23:44:00.000+08:00

Just found out that daddy threw away all my art work without asking for my permission. I was angry and I cried. Before I was going to reach my bible, Colin sent me a song "never turn back". I love the melody and my favorite is the words. It just inspired me, I should'nt cry over stupid stuff again, yeah, it was a hard work to finish those art projects but for now, my life, I should focus on Jesus, come to Him in thirst, and show the whole world what He has done for me! wow, Colin, i love that line!

So, i felt like a totally looser now...i woke up late, I spent my afternoon with susan doing silly stuff, i watch kenan and kel in the evening, and i just cried over some stupid stuff...

I wanna have a good plan for this following...see....8 days! First of all, I wanna spend all my dinner with my family, then, I wanna ride on Jeong Won's new "baby", I wanna have at least a supper with Adam, I wanna finish composing that song i've been working on, I wanna try to see if i can "kidnap" betsy my loyal piano to KL with me, I wanna spend sometime with the girls, I wanna have some more fun with Po Po, I wanna go to nostalgia again, I wanna find Hui Mee for a girl's tea break, did I miss out something? oh! i cant wait to bake Chocolate Mouse Cake with YinYin and the music sharing night!! It will be the one last time for a long period, i gonna miss it badly....:(

Will be back and keep on track for the days to come!

Listen to God's voice

2008-07-20T23:31:00.000+08:00

I was talking to Adam today at church before the service. It was short, but i'd been thinking about it throughout the day. Adam is sad and tired of all the things that happen in his life, both in school and the club that he is currently involve in. Things like that do get on to me sometime, and i know that, when life seems to be turning another way round, that's because, we refuse to slow down and listen to Him, Jesus Christ, the Leader of our life.

"But the steadfast love of the LORD is from everlasting to everlasting on those who fear him, and his righteousness to children's children, to those who keep his covenant and remember to do his commandments.-Psalm 104:17,18"

I read this passage a moment ago. It is so true that, if we follow His footstaps, we will never fall down. His merciful love, powerful hands are always there for us, hold us when we fall down, carry us when we are hopeless. Yet, we always forget or sometime refuse to just slow down a little bit, LISTEN to His voice, live our Life according to His teaching. It is sad that, sometime, we are focus on the plan WE have for OURSELVES not knowing that the right way to walk through our life is on the plan GOD has for us. And whenever we are not putting God's plan in front of us, there's where we got stumble, we fall down, we feel fear, we become powerless.

"Adam, what i've learned this eight months are not sleeping in, not schooling, watching tv, get online, but reading his Words, trying to reach out to others(unbelievers), share the Good news, and also LISTEN to His voice. If i did not slow down, took a deap breath, reading His words, figure out His plan for me, i wont be looking forward for my future where I can serve Him with my job like I do now. Here's a tip for u, whenever u are making any decision, clear your thoughts, control your heart, and ask Him is this the best way to do. Let Him do it with u, for He is the wisdom and the power! U can come to me anytime, that's what a sister for."

For the future Joey who might get lost, trying to over plan for herself, read this for joey's sake. :D

12 days to go...

2008-07-19T00:32:00.000+08:00

Haiz....staring at my mickey mouse calender now and i got 12 days to go for my first year in college....wow....i gonna be a college student soon! The road in front of me is so unpredictable, scary,magically?? ok, im mumbling again....but i guess, i'll be just fine, far beyond my expectation, if im sticking with God's plan....

So, i went to lunch with mama today....and yeah, mom, i gonna study real hard...eventhough i din admit it in front of u, i just want u to know tht, i do care...i do want to score a good GPA and get scholarships...i do working hard for this.....u are not the only one out there mom......im here...im in.....and yeah...i love u....i just dont say it out loud....u know who I am...it will be weird if i just come up to u and say i love u right? but yeah, im leaving again, i thought this time will be better since i was gone to the States far far away from home last year, but, nah...no good...haiz...tawau will be the only place i'll call home.....12 days? i need to do something great by 31st of July!

I drop by colin's house today for my books, kenan n kel's series and i gave him my pokemon series.....and i think he definitely needs a hair cut...seriously...:P then, the girls and i went to nostalgia....talking to Bob, Vic, Kak rina, Monthi, and lynna just brought all the sweet old memories back....i love nostalgia more than i can imagine....

Ok...that's it for today! ciao~

First post

2008-07-18T17:48:00.001+08:00

Is 2:27am right now, and im still up. I should have gone to bed...but i watched this really funny video just now..is called "kenan and kel"....and im wide awake now.....:(

I did not do much today...having "no life" is not fun at all...oh, i went to mandy's house though...desmond, yys, ah ming and lim shieh were there playing mahjong....today was the first day we discussed about religion...they were complaining about how complicated Christians are since we got so many dominations...they were confused about catholic and protestants too...i shared some, but i know i did not give my best...."for God has not given us the spirit of timidity, but of power and love and discipline-2 Tim. 1:7" I shoulnt worry about being a Jesus freak and holding Him back....but i still need to read more, and try to slow down, have a time for Him and listen to His voice....i need the wisdom to speak wisely too....hopefully, someday,sometime, i can talk to them again and it will be a powerful one......

Oh! I hit a dog today while adam and i were going to KFC.... i was shock in tears....and i promise that i wont read message again while im driving...i gonna put 100% attention when im on the road! im sorry lil puppy!:(

So, i guess this is it....i gonna have fun in this journey, enjoy the new life He has given me, learn to be a great tool for the awesome God!:D